Love is...and is not.


Image by Willgard Krause from Pixabay


Those of us of a certain, ahem, era were raised on fairy tales. Stories set in grand palaces and forests; containing one kind of evil stepmother – egocentric, narcissistic women who could not possibility accept their husband (usually a king) may actually have the capacity to love her and his own child simultaneously; or another kind of evil stepmother – widows so broken and bitter they were unable to love a child (left in their care) who was not born from their body; sometimes they were so beautiful they felt the need to 'compete' with their stepdaughter (who is the fairest in the land?), or they were physically 'ugly' as were their offspring; resulting in an unfortunate (but, breathtakingly beautiful) young woman being forced to flee for fear of death, overwork or imprisonment; only to be rescued by a handsome prince on a white horse (prince was also often white); who would kiss her passionately (whether she was conscious or not), awaken her (because she was just aimlessly killing time waiting for him to come along - one day my prince will come); throw her on the back of white horse (horse also handsome); and take her away for marriage, where they would live happily ever after. This was our ideal. Our understanding of love. Pressure for little girls to be beautiful (to whose standard?) to be ‘deserving of love’. Pressure for little boys to be strong, courageous and handsome (who’d like to slay this dragon?). Confusion and shame for little girls who didn’t want to kiss princes and the little boys who did. Bewilderment for children who were not represented by any of the characters. As conscious, intelligent adults we know these stories are not a portrayal of love. But what is lurking in our subconscious? Regardless of gender or background, we worry about whether we are worthy enough for love – pretty enough, funny enough, smart enough, rich enough, thin enough, ‘buff’ enough, strong enough, ‘macho’ enough, successful enough…etc. You were born worthy of love. Love is mysterious, intangible, energetics and chemistry. Love is messy and unpredictable. Love is communication, compassion, forgiveness and empathy. Love is expansion, creation and self-leadership. Love is relationship and the duality of such – the euphoria of deep connection; whilst navigating projections, past hurts and misunderstandings. Love is belief of your worthiness, mastery of your emotions, an ability to connect (even when it’s hard), a willingness to learn, a curiosity, a trust. Love is vulnerability and courage. Love is knowing when to lean in, when to lean back and when to let go. And, a whole lot of magic. Love comes in many forms - family, friendships, romantic, intimate, clients, colleagues, employees and strangers. I wish so much love for you - in all its abundance and duality.


If you would like to explore the world of love in all its forms, with me as your coach, there are some opportunities open right now.


We have two masterminds currently open - The Leadership Lounge and The Salon.


CLICK HERE for a conversation with Janelle to see if one of these options is right for you.


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