You may have heard the saying that we leave this world the same we came in - alone. Whether or not you believe this to be true is to up to you. Lately I've been curious more about how alone or supported we are whilst we are here, moving through life on planet Earth.
I have most certainly had periods of my life when I've felt completely alone (being single for many years, my first leadership role, building my business). And I've had periods in my life when I was completely alone (middle of J'Burg in a phone box arguing with Visa Support at 2am whilst travelling solo).
But how 'alone' was I really? Or was I always being supported?
Supported in life. Supported in my endeavours. Supported in my dreams and desires. Supported during challenging times. Supported on all levels - spiritually, imaginary and physically.
And whilst I now SEE that I was being supported, at all times, what did I choose to believe back then? Because so often how we experience life is all about choice. What we believe, and what we perceive is TRUE for us.
In 2011 I lost my mother to cancer, which was, and still is, the number one event in my life that affects me every day. She was kind and caring and sassy and smart and thoughtful and outspoken. One thing I truly believe since she passed, and of great comfort to me, is that she is now closer than before. She is with me every moment of every day. Within months of her passing I finally walked out on a toxic, emotionally abusive relationship because in my mind she could now see what was going on behind closed doors. And she didn't raise me to put up with that kind of treatment.
Her passing gave me a strength I hadn't had before. The unwavering support she had given me whilst alive, had raised to another level.
She has shown herself to me clearly since 2011. In July this year I was in prayer in a temple in Bali (during the retreat I facilitated). I was trying to sit exactly like the Balinese women in front of me but the concrete floor was hard and I couldn't get comfortable. The perfectionist in me was berating myself for not getting it right when her voice came through as clear as a bell. She told me to stop being so hard on myself. I hadn't expected her in BALI and exclaimed in return "Oh, Mum. You're here." She replied, almost in surprise, "What do you mean? I'm always here."
Last night she came to me in a dream. I needed to ask her something so I picked up our TV remote (I know it's not a phone but this was a dream!) and started to dial my childhood telephone number (992412). I hadn't even finished dialing the second 9 when she answered. I asked her how she knew I was calling. She told me that not only did she know it was me, she knew what I needed and it was already on it's way.
I'll say that again. She knew what I needed and it was already on it's way.
What do you believe? Do you believe a past loved one, guardian angel or the Universe has your back? That when we CHOOSE to believe we are supported we can live with more flow, take more risks and a release a more burning desire to chase our dreams?
I'll be honest here. I used to think I believed this. I even used to bang on about it. But this year I've realised that whilst I may have thought it, I didn't really believe it. I wasn't actually leaning into it in a real way. I am now and my world is changing for the better.
But, if you've met or worked with me before you will know that I am also extremely practical.
I can't sit in meditation all day and wish and hope my dreams will manifest. It's just not for me. I'm happiest when I'm in action. And I thrive being in action, with practical support.
There are practical support mechanisms I can put in place that ALSO support me and my dreams.
Janine Ellis (founder of Boost Juice and amazing entrepreneur) once said in an interview that to be success you need to "marry well". There was some controversy around her statement (obviously there are thousands of successful women who are not married - I like to think I was one!) but I interpret what she was saying is IF you choose to have a partner, choose carefully.
Choose someone who will back you, invest with you, invest IN you, dry your tears on the hard days and drink champagne with you on the good ones.
I have this with Handsome Hubby. I have this with my family. I have this with my friends. I have this with the Sky High Coaching Community.
Then there is professional support. I've spent my life calling on professional support. There are so many people out there who know things I don't, or push to me my edge, or guide me, or challenge me. Who are ready to help me succeed. Coaches, counsellors, personal trainers, naturopaths, accountants, my amazing bookkeeper, physios, my new Pilates teacher.
So this is what I choose to believe. I am never alone. I am always supported. By forces I cannot see and do not understand BUT also by those I choose to bring into my life.
I am not alone.
What do you choose to believe?
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