How to Let Go of the "What Ifs?" and Make a Clear Decision.
Hi everyone. It’s Janelle Ryan here from Sky High Coaching. If I haven't met you before, I am a Change Catalyst and I help rockstars, just like you, get out of their own way align their actions with their goals and start to create and live the life they truly love and deserve.
This is video 2 in my 5 video series on the top five mistakes that rockstars make when they're chasing that elusive goal or dream or just wanting to make a change to have, be or do something better in their lives.
So last video we talked about clarity and hopefully by now you have some clarity and you maybe even downloaded my free gift on my website that will help you do that.
So today I want to talk about the number 2 mistake you may be making and that is the fear of making a decision or the ‘what if’. What if I do this and this happens? What if I do that and that happens? So I think everyone struggles with this from time to time so the first thing I want to talk about is the decision making part.
Think about a time when you had to make a decision or you've struggled with a decision and how that may have caused an internal stress maybe even some sleepless nights depending on how large the decision was. Now think about the moment when you made the decision whether you knew was right or wrong. Think about the moment when you made the decision and think about the relief that brought. So that is the first thing I want to mention and that is we human beings are made to evolve and grow and move forward and when we just make a decision to move forward it brings such overwhelming internal relief.
Now I want to move into the what is um so this is a fear of making the wrong decision or this fear, if you dig deep more deeply under that, is often a fear of failure. So think about the ‘what ifs’ or the fear of the wrong decision as a fear of failure.
So what if you do leave your job for a new job and you don't really like it. What if you move to a new partner or move away from a partner and become single or move from being single to having a partner and it's not working out? What if you buy the Commodore over the Holden and then you don't really like it? What if? So often the worst thing that can happen is usually not a catastrophe and often the worst thing that we think may happen usually doesn't. So what do we do if we make a change of some kind and we realise that the change may not have been the right one for us? What we do is we take the feedback so we will look at the things that aren't satisfying us. What are those things in the new role? Is it the organisation? Are your skills not being utilised properly? Are you not being challenged?
What is it about the change in relationship status that isn't satisfying you? What is it about the car? The car is a good example because it's nice and practical. What is it about the car? Isn't the right colour? It doesn't have cup holders - all the things that I care about in a car - you know it may be easily changeable. We sell the car and we buy one that more meets our needs but you can utilise that process in any area.
So maybe the job you've taken isn't for you. Can you speak to someone about that? Can you ask to have your skills put to better use? Can you ask to be more challenged? Or do you take the feedback that this wasn’t the right role for you, learn from that feedback and then make steps to move towards something that is?
So when we break it all down into a practical steps often the ‘what ifs’ don't seem that frightening and as the saying goes “if we never never go, we never never know” so make a decision - it will bring relief for you - and then start moving forwards.
I do have a webinar coming up on Thursday 14th of April at 7:30 p.m. Melbourne time where I'm going to delve much further into this fear so fear of decision-making - fear of failure - the self doubt - the inner voice you may have inside that brings up all the ‘what ifs’. Maybe it goes a little further - you're not smart enough to do that - you're not clever enough to do that - you're not... Insert your own voice here.
I really encourage you to jump into this webinar. It is completely free,
the link is here
and umm I'm going to record it too so even if you don't know if you can make it at that time please register anyway so then it ensures that you will have the recording sent to you afterwards. Love for you to join me.
Hope you enjoyed today's video. Keep an eye out for video number 3. I'm going to talk about the third top mistake you may be making and I will see you then. Have a great day. Bye.