Why do we need confidence in our lives and ourselves? How important is it to us really?
Well, we all need a certain level of confidence to get through our day. Confidence to drive our car without fear of an accident. Confidence to enjoy our roles in our professional lives, knowing we can undertake the tasks expected of us. Confidence to run our business. Confidence to step up to the starting line of the next event.
Confidence to meet that “amazing person” your friend has been telling you about for ages! Confidence to attend a group exercise class for the first time.
We need a certain amount of confidence just to undertake our day to day tasks, and most of us have that. But if a lack of confidence is stopping you from moving towards something bigger and better and bolder than ever before, I encourage you to keep reading!
For example, you may be holding back from starting the business you've dreamed of for years.
You may be making excuses why you can't taking your athletic career to the world stage.
You may have a wish to be in a healthy and loving relationship with plans to start a family, but a lack of confidence stops you from dating or truly opening yourself up to someone else.
Maybe you've met someone fabulous and fallen in love, but fear of becoming an “instant parent” to their child is stopping you from taking the next step.
You may have a burning desire to climb the corporate ladder, but anxious you’re not smart or experienced enough.
You would love to return to study, but worried you are 'too' old.
Been at home for 5 years raising children and dying to go back to work? You may be frightened you no longer have the skills or talent.
The list could go and on and although the examples are different they all have one thing in common – a lack of confidence has the ability to stop us in our tracks and prevent us from moving forward towards our dreams and desires.
Why do some of us feel overwhelming confidence in some areas of our life, but terrified to take action in others?
The answers to these questions are of course linked to the individual person, but usually we lack confidence in one of more areas of our lives due to things we have been told or experienced in our life.
Anxiety and self doubt may have been something we’ve struggled with our entire lives, or a significant life event such as a divorce, redundancy, illness, injury or business failure may have temporarily knocked us sideways.
Lack of confidence feeds your resistance to change and prevents you from moving forward.
So what can we do to move us from a place of fear and paralysis into a place of confidence and action?
Grab your journal, or a piece of paper and try this short exercise.
Step 1. Decide which area of your life you need to gain or regain confidence in. Make it clear.
Step 2. Write down the goal you wish to achieve in this area.
Step 3. Consider and write down what frightens you about this goal. Don’t let it paralyse you. Just write it down and move onto Step 4.
Step 4. Take some time and write down three tiny actions you can take to lead you towards this goal.
Step 5. Look at your three actions and write down how you feel about them. If you can’t come to a place of comfort with one or more actions, consider changing them until you do.
I’ll give you an example here:
1. I need to feel confident enough to launch my business.
2. My goal is to hold a business launch by the end of October.
3. What frightens me is no one will attend the launch. What frightens me is that I will be visible and open to feedback , which could potentially be negative. What frightens me is no one will buy my product.
4. Three actions I need to take to lead me towards this goal are:
Decide on the date, time and location of my launch.
Contact my biggest cheerleaders (friends, family, mentors, coaches, networks I'm part of) and invite them to the launch.
Determine the budget for the launch.
5. How I feel about these actions:
I am excited to plan the details for the launch. I will consider it the same as planning a party for a friend.
This group of people have been amazingly supportive throughout my business adventure so far and I know they will do everything they can to attend my launch. They will be as excited as I am!
Sitting down to crunch numbers and set a budget will make me feel like a proactive and organised business owner.
Obviously this appears to be a very simplistic example, but if you give it a try you may find that just taking a few tiny steps towards something starts to make you feel better about the goal. And as you experience success when completing the tiny steps (or actions), you may try some larger ones.
This is where it gets really exciting. As you follow this process you move towards your goal AND you build your confidence.
If YOU want to learn more about how to move through fear of change and increase your confidence in the process, consider this a very heart felt invitation to join me for my upcoming Melbourne workshop "Create More Confidence".
Not only will I show how to feel more confident when moving out of your comfort zone, we will consider WHAT you are going to do with this knowledge. YOU will identify what is is you are going to DO with your extra confidence and leave the workshop with an action plan.
CLICK HERE to find out more about the CREATE MORE CONFIDENCE WORKSHOP.
If I can help to build confidence, inspire change in someone and contribute to them living the life they desire I will be one very happy coach.
Hi and thanks for reading. My name is Janelle Ryan and I am a Personal Coach who helps high performers create extraordinary lives.
If you would like to join me and learn how to CREATE MORE CONFIDENCE and start reaching for more, please CLICK HERE to find out more details and register.
See you there.