The Leadership Switch Nobody Talks About

Modern leaders often struggle with focus, energy and presence. Not because they lack skill, but because of the constant mental demand of switching between deep work and people leadership.

A client shared this with me recently. She said, “I want to be a useful, helpful and effective leader. But I’m finding it surprisingly hard - and time consuming - to switch out of my own work when someone needs me, and then switch back again. I want to be present in both".

If you lead people, there’s a good chance you recognise this.

What she was describing wasn’t a lack of skill, care or capability. It was something far more subtle, and far more common. An under-acknowledged leadership switch.

The hidden switch leaders make all day long

Modern leadership requires constant movement between two very different internal modes.

The first is deep, self-directed work. This is where strategic thinking happens. Decisions are made. Complex problems are solved. Ideas are shaped and created. This mode requires focus, internal coherence and momentum.

The second is relational leadership. Being available. Emotionally present. Responsive. Steady. Often in real time. Often without warning.

The challenge isn’t the interruption itself. It’s the switch.

One moment you’re mid-task or mid-thought. The next, you’re required to listen fully, hold context you weren’t prepared for, regulate someone else’s emotions or make a decision that affects more than just you.

And then - ideally - you’re expected to return straight back into your own work as if nothing happened.

That switching is not neutral.

Why leaders feel busy but behind

Rapidly moving between these leadership modes carries a real cognitive and nervous-system cost.

It’s why so many capable leaders report feeling:

• mentally scattered by the end of the day

• behind on their own work despite being busy

• tired in a way that rest doesn’t quite fix

This isn’t because they’re doing leadership poorly. It’s because they’re doing it well - and without the internal training most leadership frameworks ignore.

Good leaders care. They don’t rush people. They don’t half-listen. They don’t shut conversations down when someone genuinely needs guidance or support.

They offer presence. And presence takes energy.

Five things you can do immediately

Before this becomes something to "fix”, there are small, practical shifts that make an immediate difference. These don’t require more time - just more awareness.

1. Name the switch

Silently acknowledge when you’re moving into leadership mode. “I’m switching into relational leadership now.” And when the interaction ends: “I’m returning to my own work.” Naming the transition helps your nervous system follow it.

2. Don’t rush the exit

When a conversation ends, take one slow breath before moving on. Let your body register completion. It’s unfinished transitions - not conversations - that drain energy.

3. Ground before you respond

Before replying, soften your shoulders, drop your jaw, and feel your feet. This allows you to be present without absorbing what’s coming at you.

4. Create a micro-buffer

Expecting your brain to switch instantly is unrealistic. Even 60 to120 seconds of standing, stretching and/or changing rooms, helps reset your state. This isn’t inefficiency. It’s leadership hygiene.

5. Watch for residue

If you replay conversations, carry emotional weight, or stay mentally “on call” long after the moment has passed, your system hasn’t fully reset. Awareness is the first step to changing that.

Leadership is state management, not just time management

Leadership isn’t only about calendars, priorities and delegation.

It’s about state management - knowing how to move between different leadership states without leaking energy everywhere.

And here’s the good news. This ability can be trained. Your nervous system can learn how to switch between deep work and relational leadership more smoothly, without losing presence in either.

A tool to support this switch

If you are interested in learning how to do this, I think you'll like the short visualisation and meditation I designed, specifically to support this leadership switch.

It helps train the brain to move cleanly between modes.

To reset after conversations.

To regain clarity after interruption.

To be present with your team and effective in your own work.

It's free and you can find it on the Insight Timer app, or by clicking here:

Think of it as a Soft Strength leadership tool - quiet, practical and deeply supportive.

Because being a good leader doesn’t mean being constantly switched on.

It means knowing how - and when - to switch with mindfulness and presence. You can find his meditation/visualisation on Insight Timer. If this leadership switch feels familiar - the quiet pressure to prove yourself, the constant self-monitoring, the sense that you’re carrying more than anyone sees - I’ve created something for you. The Unshakeable Woman Blueprint is a complimentary guide for high-performing women who look successful on the outside but feel stretched thin inside. It offers simple, practical tools to help you quiet the noise, release the guilt and return to a steadier, more grounded way of leading - without working harder or becoming someone you’re not.

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD YOUR COMPLIMENTARY UNSHAKEABLE WOMAN BLUEPRINT.

Janelle Ryan is a globally recognised Personal, Career and Leadership Coach, renowned for guiding ambitious professionals and seasoned leaders alike to achieve extraordinary results in their careers, businesses and lives. She is the founder of Sky High Coaching, an international speaker, retreat leader, and published author who blends inspiration with practical strategies to create profound transformation.